Saturday, June 25, 2005

Happy endings, and beginnings too

I was always looking forward to this examination. This would be my final, official, graded exam, at least for the recent future to come. And I was well-prepared for this one. Not that I had to study day and night for it, for the studies were going on since the project work started about eight-nine months ago. Everyday was adding to competency, to knowledge and to possibilities. I knew I had to cherish every moment of it while it lasted.

I have always liked exams, they have made me think and perform. Without exams, there won't be any thrill left. In the coming future, the exams will not be graded by a third party (except for appraisals etc.), but by myself. This would be a tougher test. That's not a problem, though, I have had a stint with such, two years back.

The result-experience is even sweeter than the exams. And since without exams there won't be evaluations and such outcomes, I have liked exams even better.

Yesterday proved no exception to this rule. There are some moments, some lasting for a few milliseconds, others longer, when one finds all the confidence in world concentrated in himself. Nothing can ever go wrong in such situations. I felt the same energy, same urge and same self-confidence during the half-hour of the viva. They tried to catch me in tricky language of mathematics, a good effort, which I thwarted using the same weapon : mathematics. I found clarifying some of the concepts which I had struggled with earlier, at such an unimaginable venue, the exam hall! And that too when seven most feared authorities in the subject were staring at me, trying to confuse me more than ever. The key was to keep it cool and take time to answer. "Never do things in haste", I remembered the advice of the Ents, the tree people from Lord of the Rings.

I saw look of satisfaction on my guide's face, as well as on the chief examiner's face. But what was more important was that I was more satisfied than all of them. I knew I had done it. Conquered it. Won it. Done what I had secretly planned for. Perhaps this is the first time, when I do not have to worry about the outcomes : I have already given myself full marks.

Such exams are worth cherishing. Some moments are to be frozen in mind's store. Moments, such as these.

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